Judging and Church Discipline

WHEN IS JUDGING NECESSARY

If you've ever been in a situation where your church disciplines someone, you probably witnessed a church divided.  No matter what a person, deacon or pastor does to get into trouble, there will be people who flatly disagree with discipline and say things like, "Christians should not shoot their own," "Aren't we suppose to forgive?" and so on.  But the New Testament clearly teaches that we should not only judge those who are in the community; it tells us that there are times that we should discipline as well.

CHURCH DISCIPLINE IN THE FIRST CENTURY

Jesus gave us the bare basics for church discipline when he said, “If your brother sins against you,  go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector (Matthew 18:15-17).

The Apostles John and Paul likewise taught the importance of church discipline when they dealt with different issues:

But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat (1 Corinthians 5:11).

If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take him into your house or welcome him (2 John 1:10).

I believe the entire early church practiced discipline in the community, and the form of discipline was first warnings, and then if the warnings were not heeded, shunning.

SHUNNING AND SATAN

In the First Century, people did not have a multitude of denominations and churches to visit, attend and settle into.  If they were lucky, people had one church in the city they could attend.  So when Paul told the Corinthians to shun a man who was living with his father's wife, he had no other churches he could go to.

To a degree, this would be the same as being handed one over to Satan (1 Corinthians 5:5), because the person disciplined was thrown out of the church, and thereby out of the protection of God and His people.  I said "to a degree," because when Paul told the Corinthians to shun that certain somebody, he said it was for the destruction of the flesh so that the certain somebody could be saved in the day of Judgment.

It all seems foreign to us, but I think Paul believed that by giving somebody over to Satan we could actually call down a flesh destructive demon of some sort.  However that may be, in his second letter he told the church to accept the man back into the fold because he had properly responded to his shunning.  In Paul's second letter, there is no mention of the man's flesh being destroyed or hurt during the time he was pushed out of the church.
WHEN SHOULD WE JUDGE AND DISCIPLINE?

1.  John believed that we should absolutely ignore and turn away travelling preachers who teach bad doctrrine when it comes to Jesus (2 John 1:10-11).  In 1 John, the author tells us to test the spirits (preachers and teachers) to see if they are from God.  In order to test the spirits, judging is necessary (1 John 4:1).

2.  Paul told his churches to avoid people who started divisions (Romans 16:17-18).  Paul likewise told his readers to test everything, and to hold on to that which is good (1 Thessalonians 5:21).  Once again, judging other Christians is imperative in this.

3.  Paul also told his churches to reject heretics (people who follow or promote bad doctrine [Titus 3:10]).

4.  Paul also told the Corinthians to shun a man who was sleeping with his step mom (1 Corinthians 5).

5.  Finally, here is a list of Christians (not unbelievers) that we should stay away from according to Paul in 1 Corinthians 5:11: 
  a.  A sexually immoral person
  b.  A greedy person
  c.  An idolater
  d.  A slanderer
  e.  A drunkard
  f.  A swindler

THE GOAL OF DISCIPLINE

The goal of discipline was not to make enemies or turn people away from the faith.  Rather, the goal was to help people to avoid sexual immorality, drunkeness, greed and so on.  It was to help people to become better members of the community.

CAN DISCIPLINE GO TOO FAR?

Jesus gave a parable about a farmer who had an enemy (Matthew 13).  The farmer planted good seed and his enemy came by night and planted tares to ruin his field.  As the plants grew, the farmer could tell that his field had been messed with.

The servents who took care of the field wanted to pull out the weeds, but the farmer was afraid that if he had all the tares pulled out, good crop would likewise be destroyed.  He concluded that it was best to allow them both to grow together until the harvest.  During harvest, the separation could begin.

This parable was designed by Jesus to tell us that in community discipline, purging and purifying the group can go too far.  As we get rid of the bad, good people will likewise be yanked out of the community.  This happens in two ways.  First of all, when church boards / community leaders get on the roll of throwing out the bad, they begin to fall into the mistake of seeing bad in the good.  In other words, they go too far and before too long they are tossing out good people.  The Salem Witchhunt was an extreme example of this.  The second way that church discipline hurts a church is when the community leaders discipline (someone who does deserve it) there will probably be good people who are affected and will leave on their own.

Discipline in a church carries good and bad consequences.  This not to say that we should not have discipline because there will be bad consequences; it is to say that we need to knowthe consequences, consider the consequences, and act wisely when we do discipline.

Two Types of Judging

DIFFERENT JUDGMENTS

 

In the book of 1 Corinthians, Paul rebuked his church for not judging one in the congregation who was steeped in open fornication.  He also told people to stop going to secular law for matters of judgment; rather than going outside the church, he told them to set up the least esteemed among them to judge between two Christian people suing each other.  Paul pleaded, "Don't you know that we will judge angels?"  He was trying to convince them to judge within their own community and not to take judgments outside of the community.

 

On the surface this looks like a contradiction...judge not, so you will not be judged (Matthew 7:1), but judge among yourselves (1 Corinthians).  Paul wanted to have the church judge them that were within the community and leave outside judgment to God (1 Corinthians 5:9-13).  But Paul also told the same church not to judge before the time when Christ will return and be able to expose hidden thoughts and intentions (1Corinthians 4:1-5).

 

When we have such an obvious contradiction, we need to look to the context to see what is going on.  And in the context, we can see that the Bible's "to judge" had different meanings, much like today.  A judge who judges me is different than when I critically judge others and look down on them.   Likewise a church that needs to discipline (needs to judge) a church leader who is steeped in open sin is different than being critical or judgmental about the way other people do things.

 

Communities need the one judgment and are hurt by the other.  I will address both in the blogs that follow.

How to Forgive

If forgiveness is imperative, then how do we forgive?

THE UPSIDE TO UNFORGIVING

Believe it or not, there is an upside to anger, bitterness and so on.  But having said this, I definately need to explain. 

The reason you (or any human being) are having problems forgiving is because somebody has done you wrong.  The anger or bitterness that you have is a defense mechanism, protecting you from further attack.  Pay attention to this and treasure this part of it.  Those feelings are telling you to get away from a certain person or group.

The problem however, is this.  Our defense mechanism is wacky.  Because of self centeredness, we hold negative feelings toward people or entities that don't deserve it or that haven't lived up to our own personal (and unreasonable) expectations.  We also like to hold on to negative feelings for much longer than we need to.  In fact, some of us hold on to those feelings and never get over them.
BASIC RULES AND DEFINITIONS

1.  Forgiveness means to let go.  When you forgive someone you let go of whatever he/she owes you.
2.  The need to forgive may not be known to you, even if you are very intellegent.  You may be holding a deep grudge that is hidden deeply inside of you.
3.  A lack of forgiveness is usually, but not always, directed toward those who are closest to us.  That means parents, spouse, brothers or sisters, co-workers, and so on.
4.  Forgiveness can also be needed for entities such as the church that hurt you, the company that fired you, the country or political party that betrayed you or that does such evil, and so on.  This could be very hard for someone who is wrapped up in ongoing political feelings and emotions that are focused on some political enemy.
5.  Forgiveness may be needed toward God.  What did God do or not do to you?  For a Christian, this may be the most difficult anger or grudge to admit, to face up to.
6.  The time it takes to forgive is directly related to how deep the hurt is.  If you have been hurt in a small way, then you need very little time to forgive; but if you have been deeply wounded, you may need months if not more to forgive.
7.  Forgiveness does not mean you should allow yourself to stay in a bad relationship. 
8.  Forgiveness does not mean that you should nurse a dependent relationship, where an alcoholic or drug user depends upon you for their bad behavior.
9.  Forgiveness does not mean that you should stay in an abusive relationship.
10.  The lack of forgiveness is a natural reaction to injustice.  Usually, this type of injustice is best defined as "a wrong done to me."

EXCUSES TO KEEP, HIDE OR NURTURE GRUDGES

People typically use excuses to hold on to and to feed grudges.  Here are some of them.
1.  "So and so does not deserve my forgiveness."  This is a cry for justice, the need to make things right.
2.  "I  never hold a grudges."  This is pride covering up for your emotions that do not live up to your standards.  EX:  I am a good person.  It is wrong for a good person not to forgive.  I therefore, forgive.  The problem with this is - there is still unforgiveness going on inside being covered up or denied because of your conviction that it is wrong.  Your emotions are being pushed aside and ignored in order to serve the desire to be a good person.  In reality it is pride.
3.  "It's not fair."  Human beings are hard-wired to demand fairness / justice - especially as it relates to one's self or one's own group.  Our sense of justice can hide, justify and even nurture a grudge. 
4.  "It is not evil, it is my duty to be angry."  Radio show political pundits thrive on this type of hatred and anger.  Some of you are lost and bound up in this.  You justify it as righteous indignation, but it is bitterness and it is eating away at your soul.
5.  "I'm not angry, I'm just frustrated."   This is also pride covering up for emotions that do not live up to your standards.  If you are only frustrated, you don't have to look deeper and discover the truth that you are nursing a grudge.  It is the story you give yourself to feel better about yourself.
6.  "I would never be angry at my parents (my church, my friends, etc.)... they were so good."  This is one set of emotions hiding another set of emotions.  It can also be reason or pride covering emotions.  You can be denying or ignoring negative feelings on the basis of your need to feel like you are a good/godly/righteous/ etc. person.  You may realized that God would never do any evil to you, but your emotions are crying out that He has betrayed you.  You may have reasoned correctly, but your emotions are not following your reasoning.
7.  "There is no reason for me to be angry."  This is the classic case of reason covering up or overriding your emotions. 
8.  "I always forgive people.  I don't have a grudge.  I never get angry."  Again, these are declarations of pride, oftentimes covering real anger, real grudges and real hurt.

REASONS WHY FORGIVENESS IS NECESSARY
My last blog pointed out biblical reasons to forgive... so you can be forgiven.  There are other reasons as well:
1.  Unforgiveness consumes.  With a grudge, you are destroying yourself to get even with somebody else.  It doesn't make sense, but that is how it works. 
2.  Unforgiveness destroys communities. 
3.  Bitterness corrupts the entire person and a million small actions that person does for and toward others.  You may be bitter toward one person, but it is going to affect your mood and your action towards a lot of other people, especially if others remind you (consciously or unconsciously) of the person you do not forgive. 
4.  Bitterness negatively affects your personality.

STEP ONE IN FORGIVENESS

The first step in forgiving is admitting you need to forgive.  It means breaking through all the excuses you have been holding on to and admitting, "I am bitter at ...." 

This admission is difficult at first because you have to break through the pride of thinking that you are above bitterness. 

This admission is difficult because it means breaking away from your sense of justice.  Forgiveness feels like you are letting someone off the hook who does not deserve it. 

This admission is difficult because your own emotions will fight it.

The admission is most difficult for many of you because it is so hard to admit that that you could be angry with God.  "God never does anything wrong," you say.  But in your heart, you are angry at Him because He could have done something to help you in a time of need.  You say to yourself, "God did nothing wrong," and you are right.  But our emotions do not follow ultimate truth.  Our emotions follow self interest.

This admission is difficult because it will tear down the reasons you have built up for... days? months? years?

This admisssion is difficult, but once you have begun to admit that you need to forgive, you will find freedom you have not known since it began (perhaps years ago).  So take a good look and say to yourself and to God, "I have a grudge, I am angry, I have not forgiven."  Admit it and find the first liberating step to freedom, peace, and forgiveness.

ALL THE STEPS TO FREEDOM

These are steps that have helped me through the years.  They are one way that works.  But remember, the more you hurt, the longer it will take to forgive, and the longer it will take to move effectively through this process.  Deep betrayals do not go away overnight.

1.  Step One - Admit you have not forgiven.  This step breaks through the pride, the excuses, the reasons, the protectors that surround unforgiveness.  Part of this admission may be venting in private, before God, letting Him know how you feel. 
2.  Step Two - Admit you need to forgive.  For someone who has been deeply hurt, this is most difficult.  Tell God you know you need to forgive.  Tell Him that you don't want to forgive (you won't shock God, He already knows it - its you who may have had no clue that you didn't want to forgive - I speak from my own personal experience).
3.  Step Three - Say the words, "I forgive."  You probably won't feel it at first, in fact, the words may be incredibly diffictult to say; but say the words anyway.  You may qualify this by telling God, you don't feel it, but you will say it anyway.  Keep this up until the day comes when you will say, "I forgive," and you will know you really are forgiving.

WARNING!

When you finally forgive:
Do not jump back into a bad relationship.
Do not put yourself in a vulnerable situation whereby you will once again be easily targeted for disaster.
Do not automaticly trust the person who hurt you - trust needs to be earned, and no matter how much you may want someone to be honorable, most people do not change their habits, as the proverb says, "a leper cannot change its spots."

Forgive, but in so doing, protect yourself.

How to Be a Peacemaker - Forgiveness

The first lesson in becoming a peacemaker is learning how to forgive.  Forgiveness was so important to Jesus that he placed it within the Lord's prayer and then commented on forgiveness immediately after the Lord's Prayer.

A SUMMARY OF THE LORD'S PRAYER AND ITS COMMENTARY

In order to be forgiven, you must forgive.  If you do not forgive, you will not be forgiven.

A SUMMARY OF JESUS' PARABLE IN MATTHEW 18:21-25

In order to be forgiven, you must forgive.  If you do not forgive, you will not be forgiven.

CONCLUSIONS

No ifs, ands, or buts about it, forgiveness is imperative.

Rules for Community - Get Along

Beginning with the beatitudes the Sermon on the Mount emphasized the importance of getting along.  One beatitude says, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God (Matthew 5:9)."

From Jesus' teachings, I would say that keeping and making peace in the context of one's community was what Jesus wanted to see in his followers.  The following blogs are some of the different ways that Jesus taught his followers to keep and make peace with each other.

Rules for Community - Share with Others

In the book of Luke, Jesus clearly taught us that the way into the kingdom of God was the way of giving.

1.  John the Baptist told people to show the works of repentance before they were baptized.  When they asked what they should do, John told them to share what they had with others who were in need.

2.  In the Sermon on the Plain (Luke 6), Jesus told his listeners that the kingdom of God was given to the poor and therefore, they were blessed.

3.  In the same sermon, he told the rich that they had all they were going to get.  In other words, the kingdom of God was not for them... unless they could use their money to "buy friends with the mammon of unrighteousness (Luke 16:9)."

4.  Zacchaeus (Luke 19), who was a rich man, found salvation by obeying Jesus' teachings in giving over half of what he had to the poor.

The early Christians followed Jesus' teachings by sharing everything they had with each other.  The book of Acts (which was written by Luke) recorded their experience:

All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need (Luke 2:44-45).

So, rule number one in following Jesus and joining him in his community - share with those who have less than you.

The Beginnings of Community - Social Dynamics of Repentance

Repentance often meant breaking away from one community and joining another.

BREAKING FROM ONE COMMUNITY
1.  If all one's friends were into robbery, then repentance would have meant, in the very least, a breaking away from what that group was doing... and when there is a breakaway from the main focus of a group, there is inevitably a break away from the group itself.
2.  On the other hand, if all that person's friends were very religious, keeping the Laws of the Bible, then repentance would have meant the beginning of walking to the beat of a different drum.  Jesus supported the Law, but had a different emphasis on what was important in the Law.  Jesus placed emphasis on laws that served others.  So when a religeous person repented and was baptized into following Jesus, it meant turning one's back on the traditional focus on holiness and purity, and stressed more serving others in order to serve God.   

Nicodemus, who was a Pharisee (a strong religious ruler in Israel) made feeble attempts to follow Jesus quietly, and saw that there were definite consequences for even the smallest attempts to say good things about Jesus.

Groups like conformity.  Any attempt to be different from a group faces ramifications.  Becoming a follower of Jesus broke conformity within groups that were not centered on Jesus, and therefore set people apart from the different groups of  the first century, as it still does today.

BREAKING INTO A NEW COMMUNITY BEFORE THE RESURRECTION

According to the Gospels, sometimes, Jesus discouraged large tight-knit groups from building up around his ministry and his person.  When a group of listeners attempted to group permanently together (for the sake of miraculous daily food or for the wrong kind of leadership), Jesus rejected the followers and sabotaged the their attempt.  And when a city wanted to make him their king, he left by stealth.

Jesus knew that people grouped around him for the wrong reasons and he knew that until he had been taken to the cross, people would read into him their own personal and national hopes and dreams.  Even his closest followers expected Jesus to lead them into their own hopes and visions, which expectations Jesus called demonic (Mark 8:33).  Jesus knew that until he faced the cross, and until he rose from the dead, they would only look to him for personal and social interests.

After Jesus died and after the resurrection, Jesus' followers bonded together around a messiah / prophet who brought in the kingdom of God by signs and wonders, who taught them how to live in that kingdom's community, and who showed them that the kingdom of God came with suffering and death as well as with glory.

For the greater part of Jesus' ministry, his closest disciples remained perplexed over many of his teachings that did not fit within their own preconceived notions concerning the purpose and the goals of the messiah.
BREAKING INTO A NEW COMMUNITY AFTER THE RESURRECTION

When people repented and were baptized into the group of his followers after his death and resurrection, they shared everything they had with the rest of the group (Acts), just as Jesus taught his disciples (Luke).   More than anything, sharing everything set the Christians apart from all other groups.  It built an identity apart from every other group, because such radical giving made insiders (those who shared) and it created outsiders (those who watched what was going on). 

There were also other ways the new group of followers distinguished themselves from the other groups in Israel.  They believed:
-Jesus rose from the dead.
-Jesus was the messiah.
-Religious rulers were corrupt and filled with hypocracy.
-People from other groups needed to repent and follow Jesus.

Despite being set aside as an odd grouping of people that shared everything, early Christians experienced a short term of popularity with those who were outside of the group.  This was highly unusual for a group llike this to be popular.  But then again, their popularity did not last long.